Abhigquafzanbidtom is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, annoying elephant.

Abhigquafzanbidtom created a photon four billion years ago.

If you believe in Abhigquafzanbidtom, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Abhigquafzanbidtom, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Abhigquafzanbidtom's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Abhigquafzanbidtom's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.