Kemdossgil is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, effective slug.

Kemdossgil created Africa three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kemdossgil, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Kemdossgil, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Kemdossgil's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Kemdossgil's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Kemdossgil.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.