Bissquillbemcar is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, unfair toad.

Bissquillbemcar created oxygen eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bissquillbemcar, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Bissquillbemcar, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Bissquillbemcar's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Bissquillbemcar's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Run away if three snakes approach from the north.

3. Worship no other gods but Bissquillbemcar.

4. Never wear skirts.

5. Always obey Bissquillbemcar's priests.