Nurrilnig is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, grumpy warg.

Nurrilnig created a charm quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurrilnig, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nurrilnig, it will cry a lot.

Nurrilnig's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Nurrilnig's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Erect six platinum sculptures of Nurrilnig on top of important buildings.

3. Always make sure there are no eagles in a building before entering it.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Worship no other gods but Nurrilnig.