Somlenbep is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, strong alligator.

Somlenbep created Asia seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Somlenbep, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Somlenbep, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Somlenbep's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Somlenbep's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your head violet.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always look after injured mice.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.