Legtarpfod is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, unthoughtful squirrel.

Legtarpfod created the world three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Legtarpfod, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Legtarpfod, he will be mildly annoyed.

Legtarpfod's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Legtarpfod's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large tin sculpture of Legtarpfod on top of all buildings.

2. Do not wear blue clothing.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Hide if three sheep approach from the south.

5. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.