Xenkarnig is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, grumpy bird.

Xenkarnig created silver three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xenkarnig, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Xenkarnig, she will boil you in a big pot.

Xenkarnig's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Xenkarnig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair white.

2. Worship no other gods but Xenkarnig.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never go into turquoise rooms.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.