Paswadfun is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, staggering zebra.

Paswadfun created the planet Saturn five billion years ago.

If you believe in Paswadfun, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Paswadfun, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Paswadfun's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Paswadfun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never hurt horses.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Always make sure there are no pigs in a building before entering it.