Ponripcad is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, calm octopus.

Ponripcad created the Sol system four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ponripcad, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ponripcad, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Ponripcad's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Ponripcad's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in holy places.

2. Eagles are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not laugh in public.

5. Do not cook food in pots.