Cepfutton is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, prudent chinchilla.

Cepfutton created a charm quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cepfutton, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Cepfutton, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Cepfutton's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Cepfutton's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in holy places.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Cepfutton.

4. Do not wear gray clothing.

5. Run away from fawn mites, for they are unholy.