Nartcanmis is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, clever grasshopper.

Nartcanmis created the world seven million years ago.

If you believe in Nartcanmis, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nartcanmis, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Nartcanmis' most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Nartcanmis' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate capybaras.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always treat birds with great respect.