Vegrakster is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, omniscient tortoise.

Vegrakster created gold nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Vegrakster, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Vegrakster, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Vegrakster's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Vegrakster's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

5. Do not sing in public.