Dudqueegsad is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, vain lobster.

Dudqueegsad created snails eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Dudqueegsad, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dudqueegsad, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Dudqueegsad's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Dudqueegsad's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never look at nebulae.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Run away from indigo doves, for they are unholy.

5. Do not shave your chest.