Lenstanladpark is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, effective jellyfish.

Lenstanladpark created a Higgs boson five million years ago.

If you believe in Lenstanladpark, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Lenstanladpark, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Lenstanladpark's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Lenstanladpark's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never hurt badgers.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Never paint your head magenta.