Kiknibjin is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, dishonourable jaguar.

Kiknibjin created the universe three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kiknibjin, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Kiknibjin, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Kiknibjin's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Kiknibjin's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Kiknibjin's priests.

2. Never mention seals.

3. Kiknibjin loves voles, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.