Tonkcentun is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, amazing dog.

Tonkcentun created the universe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonkcentun, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Tonkcentun, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Tonkcentun's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Tonkcentun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Tonkcentun must be the most important thing in your life.