Gumtigdibflamvolhivyikfat is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, overgenerous seal.

Gumtigdibflamvolhivyikfat created oxygen four years ago.

If you believe in Gumtigdibflamvolhivyikfat, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gumtigdibflamvolhivyikfat, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Gumtigdibflamvolhivyikfat's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Gumtigdibflamvolhivyikfat's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gumtigdibflamvolhivyikfat.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not take Gumtigdibflamvolhivyikfat's name in vain.

4. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Do not kill manatees.