Poptofnutt is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, ill-tempered armadillo.

Poptofnutt created the cosmos four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Poptofnutt, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Poptofnutt, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Poptofnutt's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Poptofnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Retreat if five tortoises approach from the south.

3. Do not wear copper on your body.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Always pray immersed in water.