Witquatpib is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, fast whale.

Witquatpib created the Sombrero Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Witquatpib, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Witquatpib, he will try to impress you with trees.

Witquatpib's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Witquatpib's Holy Commandments

1. Witquatpib must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Witquatpib.

5. Whales are unholy and should not be approached.