Nibcumrow Safjabtim is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, unselfish zebra.

Nibcumrow Safjabtim created life five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nibcumrow Safjabtim, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Nibcumrow Safjabtim, he will torture you forever.

Nibcumrow Safjabtim's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Nibcumrow Safjabtim's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nibcumrow Safjabtim.

2. Never run in holy places.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never mention snails.

5. Never write about gravity.