Yogingcut Jopgemloop is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, passionate snake.

Yogingcut Jopgemloop created the Milkyway six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yogingcut Jopgemloop, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Yogingcut Jopgemloop, she will turn you into a puffin.

Yogingcut Jopgemloop's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Yogingcut Jopgemloop's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sharks.

2. Do not hurt sheep.

3. Put Yogingcut Jopgemloop first in all things.

4. Never go into turquoise rooms.

5. Do not cook food in pots.