Hudsomxen is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, omniscient pigeon.

Hudsomxen created Mount Everest two billion years ago.

If you believe in Hudsomxen, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Hudsomxen, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Hudsomxen's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Hudsomxen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

2. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.

3. Hudsomxen must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Hudsomxen.