Bepbidyar is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, awesome raccoon.

Bepbidyar created light seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bepbidyar, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bepbidyar, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bepbidyar's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Bepbidyar's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention foxes.

2. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Always wear gray.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bepbidyar.