Lamtettifun is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, wise cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Lamtettifun created Europe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lamtettifun, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Lamtettifun, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Lamtettifun's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Lamtettifun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Always help sick nematodes.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.