Kopbuming Ontbiss is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, strong donkey.

Kopbuming Ontbiss created the Cigar Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Kopbuming Ontbiss, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Kopbuming Ontbiss, he will turn you into a plant.

Kopbuming Ontbiss' most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Kopbuming Ontbiss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always look after injured grasshopers.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never wear jumpers.

5. Do not speak about apples.