Tamzentim is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, tranquil chicken.

Tamzentim created the Small Magellanic Cloud six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tamzentim, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tamzentim, he will curse you with boils.

Tamzentim's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Tamzentim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Tamzentim's name in vain.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Always help swans.

5. Always treat gulls with great respect.