Dabfeb is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, omnipotent whale.

Dabfeb created the Sol system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dabfeb, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dabfeb, she will laugh at you.

Dabfeb's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Dabfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate manatees.

2. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Dabfeb loves capybaras, so they must be respected.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.