Bemgofvin is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, impressive hummingbird.

Bemgofvin created tapeworms two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bemgofvin, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bemgofvin, she will be mildly annoyed.

Bemgofvin's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Bemgofvin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Never hurt otters.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Pray towards the north.