Zodflam is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, unjust monkey.

Zodflam created the solar system seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zodflam, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Zodflam, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Zodflam's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Zodflam's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from brown gulls for they are unholy.

2. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always help badgers.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.