Nurlsawjigarf is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, self-confident mink.

Nurlsawjigarf created the Sombrero Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlsawjigarf, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nurlsawjigarf, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Nurlsawjigarf's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Nurlsawjigarf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

3. Always make sure there are no tortoises in a building before entering it.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not make images of living things.