Gebjighom is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, happy donkey.

Gebjighom created dark energy four million years ago.

If you believe in Gebjighom, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gebjighom, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Gebjighom's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Gebjighom's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate dolphins.

2. Do not take Gebjighom's name in vain.

3. Never mention snails.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Always look after injured horses.