Tettimigwap is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, fussy butterfly.

Tettimigwap created life three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tettimigwap, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Tettimigwap, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Tettimigwap's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Tettimigwap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate moths.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never wear mauve shirts.