Gemdossven is a god.

It takes the form of a small, witless crow.

Gemdossven created viruses two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gemdossven, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gemdossven, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Gemdossven's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Gemdossven's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Erect eight nickel sculptures of Gemdossven on top of important buildings.

3. Never look at asteroids.

4. Never paint your neck white.

5. Pray towards the north.