Jatpangnar Rullhomdid Dadjaptan is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, resourceful gerbil.

Jatpangnar Rullhomdid Dadjaptan created a down quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jatpangnar Rullhomdid Dadjaptan, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Jatpangnar Rullhomdid Dadjaptan, he will destroy your home solar system.

Jatpangnar Rullhomdid Dadjaptan's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Jatpangnar Rullhomdid Dadjaptan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your neck.

2. Never talk about moons.

3. Run away if nine goats approach from the west.

4. Fast once a month.

5. You must never eat garlic.