Beppogten is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, loving naga.

Beppogten created the Sun five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Beppogten, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Beppogten, she will throw large rocks at you.

Beppogten's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Beppogten's Holy Commandments

1. Bats are not to be trusted.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Beppogten.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Always help sick porpoises.