Garbanged is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, blissful snake.

Garbanged created everything that exists nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Garbanged, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Garbanged, it will turn you into a rat.

Garbanged's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Garbanged's Holy Commandments

1. Eagles are not to be trusted.

2. Always treat turtles with great respect.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never eat lemons.

5. Never wear purple tights.