Larghabpang is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, cheerful cat.

Larghabpang created Mount Everest three million years ago.

If you believe in Larghabpang, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Larghabpang, he will remove you from existence.

Larghabpang's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Larghabpang's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.

4. You must pray to Larghabpang seven times a day.

5. Do not dye your hair blue.