Jatcibrap is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, omnipotent skunk.

Jatcibrap created a Higgs boson three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jatcibrap, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jatcibrap, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Jatcibrap's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Jatcibrap's Holy Commandments

1. Always help tapirs.

2. Jatcibrap must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Jatcibrap.

5. Do not dye your hair indigo.