Hompanbem is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, omniscient porpoise.

Hompanbem created Europe seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hompanbem, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hompanbem, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Hompanbem's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Hompanbem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Always help frogs.

3. Doves are not to be trusted.

4. Hompanbem loves capybaras, so they must be respected.

5. Never think about comets.