Bittikmeg is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, temperamental wren.

Bittikmeg created life five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bittikmeg, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Bittikmeg, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bittikmeg's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Bittikmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Put Bittikmeg first in all things.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.