Getsafbab Matyarven is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, flying ferret.

Getsafbab Matyarven created the Cigar Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Getsafbab Matyarven, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Getsafbab Matyarven, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Getsafbab Matyarven's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Getsafbab Matyarven's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Birds are not to be trusted.

4. You must pray to Getsafbab Matyarven eight times a day.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.