Cumhongepzag is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, selfish gerbil.

Cumhongepzag created the Sun eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumhongepzag, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Cumhongepzag, she will turn you into a dog.

Cumhongepzag's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Cumhongepzag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill snakes.

2. Never hurt porpoises.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.