Gilhugwapmat Homqueegabmilwipdonmutved is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, tranquil fly.

Gilhugwapmat Homqueegabmilwipdonmutved created the Small Magellanic Cloud two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gilhugwapmat Homqueegabmilwipdonmutved, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gilhugwapmat Homqueegabmilwipdonmutved, he will jump up and down on your head.

Gilhugwapmat Homqueegabmilwipdonmutved's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Gilhugwapmat Homqueegabmilwipdonmutved's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a building before entering it.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never hurt horses.

4. Never go into indigo rooms.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.