Vilstafomt is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, compassionate slug.

Vilstafomt created silver eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vilstafomt, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Vilstafomt, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Vilstafomt's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Vilstafomt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not eat turnips.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never sit near bats.

5. Never talk about gravity.