Fitmilwan is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, boastful scorpion.

Fitmilwan created oxygen four million years ago.

If you believe in Fitmilwan, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fitmilwan, it will try to impress you with trees.

Fitmilwan's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Fitmilwan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

4. Always obey Fitmilwan's priests.

5. Never think ill of sick capybaras.