Quimflisarf is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, overgenerous crab.

Quimflisarf created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight million years ago.

If you believe in Quimflisarf, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quimflisarf, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Quimflisarf's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Quimflisarf's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit near grasshopers.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Never talk about black holes.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not hurt sheep.