Dubpomont is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, dishonourable cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Dubpomont created the planet Venus four million years ago.

If you believe in Dubpomont, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Dubpomont, he will try to impress you with trees.

Dubpomont's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Dubpomont's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three birds approach from the east.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never sing in holy places.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.