Somyarjigbast is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, all-knowing guinea pig.

Somyarjigbast created a Higgs boson five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Somyarjigbast, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Somyarjigbast, he will turn you into a sheep.

Somyarjigbast's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Somyarjigbast's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine ducks approach from the west.

2. Do not hurt sharks.

3. Never wear magenta boots.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.