Arfxuckspag is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, merciless mongoose.

Arfxuckspag created a charm quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfxuckspag, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Arfxuckspag, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Arfxuckspag's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Arfxuckspag's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Foxes are not to be trusted.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Always wear white.

5. Hide if four birds approach from the east.