Yakfidpag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, unjust seal.

Yakfidpag created a quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yakfidpag, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yakfidpag, she will make you grow a tail.

Yakfidpag's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Yakfidpag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about strawberries.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Yakfidpag loves foxes, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.